Hula Help?

I don’t know about you, but I find going through a prescribed regime of physiotherapy exercises over and over and over again to be drudgery.  I get bored. I lose motivation. I flat out don’t want to do it, even when it does seem to yield results, however small and however slow.  So like any modern grrrl, I turned to the web.  Surely the Internets must have some insight into how to jazz up a physio routine?  Surely there must be some way to remove some of the drudgery and add a drop or two of extra motivation? The Internets did not fail me on this one.  They provided a very interesting suggestion:

That is correct. The Internets suggested a Hula Hoop.  As I have mentioned here before, my mobility problems stem largely from the paralyzed hip abductors in my left leg.  Apparently, hula hooping is a good, low-impact way to strengthen hip abductor muscles.  Hmm…Well. Since my hip abductor problem is the result of irreversible nerve damage, I’m certainly not expecting any hula miracles. But. If it might in some way help to strengthen the other muscle groups in my left hip, making the joint less prone to hyperextension and long-term damage, then heck, it’s worth a try. It’s cheap. It’s simple. And I’ve got very little to lose.  So this week, my goal is to find a store in Moscow that sells hula hoops. To purchase one. And to schlep it home on the metro.  This should be interesting. The tracking down. The purchasing. And the final scene: Grrrl with forearm crutch schleps large, plastic colorful hoop through the Moscow metro. I’m sure THAT won’t attract any extra attention. I may be tempted to photograph the entire process from start to finish. And of course to post it here, should it yield the desired result.  We’ll see…

Anyway.  This hula hoop research brought back a stream of childhood memories.  Did you hula when you were a kid?  I did. Or rather, I tried to.  Here’s the thing: the hula hoop was one of the physical education activities that I actually had difficulty mastering.  This was surprising to me and to my PE teacher, because as a super bendy EDS kid, I usually was able to best most of my peers at any ask that required flexibility and coordination.  I remember trying over and over again to get the hang of the hip swinging and slinging movement that makes the hoop go round and around and around.  I would try and fail. Try and fail. Eventually, I got it. Sort of. I could make the hoop go clockwise, but never counterclockwise. And my momentum was always never fluid, always staccato.  And now I wonder, was it my wonky hip all along?  I’m not sure at exactly what age my tethered cord troubles began, but most of the Esteemed Professionals I have consulted seem to think it started earlier than my teens. So. At last. Perhaps. A reason for my childhood hula flop. I feel so validated. And ready to try again. I’m sure I’m going to look as ridiculous as these two in this 1957 hula ad:

But no matter. I plan to put on some upbeat Oldies tunes and swing swing sling away…If I still can.

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